1.A man left his cat with his brother while he went on vacation for a week. When he came back, the man called his brother to see when he could pick the cat up. The brother hesitated, then said, `I`m so sorry, but while you were away, the cat died.`
The man was very upset and yelled, `You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn`t come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away.`
The brother thought about it and apologized.
`So how`s Mom?` asked the man.
`She`s on the roof and won`t come down.`
The man was very upset and yelled, `You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn`t come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away.`
The brother thought about it and apologized.
`So how`s Mom?` asked the man.
`She`s on the roof and won`t come down.`
2. A couple had two little boys, ages eight and ten, who were excessively mischievous.
The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be confident that if any mischief occurred in their town, their two young sons were involved in some capacity. The parents were at their wit`s end as to what to do about their sons` behavior.
The parents had heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children in the past, so they contacted him, and he agreed to give it his best shot. He asked to see the boys individually, so the eight-year-old was sent to meet with him first. The clergyman sat the boy down and asked him sternly, `Where is God?`
The boy made no response, so the clergyman repeated the question in an even sterner tone, `Where is God?`
Again the boy made no attempt to answer, so the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy`s face, `WHERE IS GOD?`
At that, the boy bolted from the room, ran directly home, and slammed himself in his closet. His older brother followed him into the closet and said, `What happened?`
The younger brother replied, `We are in BIG trouble this time. God is missing and they think we did it!`
The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be confident that if any mischief occurred in their town, their two young sons were involved in some capacity. The parents were at their wit`s end as to what to do about their sons` behavior.
The parents had heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children in the past, so they contacted him, and he agreed to give it his best shot. He asked to see the boys individually, so the eight-year-old was sent to meet with him first. The clergyman sat the boy down and asked him sternly, `Where is God?`
The boy made no response, so the clergyman repeated the question in an even sterner tone, `Where is God?`
Again the boy made no attempt to answer, so the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy`s face, `WHERE IS GOD?`
At that, the boy bolted from the room, ran directly home, and slammed himself in his closet. His older brother followed him into the closet and said, `What happened?`
The younger brother replied, `We are in BIG trouble this time. God is missing and they think we did it!`
3. You Must Answer Two (2) or More Questions Correctly to Qualify.
1. What language is spoken in France?
2. Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions. OR Give the first name of PIERRE Trudeau.
3. Would you ask William Shakespeare to: (a) build a bridge (b) sail the ocean (c) lead an army (d) WRITE A PLAY
4. What religion is the Pope? (Check only one) (a) Jewish (b) CATHOLIC (c) Hindu (d) Swedish (e) Agnostic
5. Metric conversion. How many feet in 0.0 meters?
6. What time is it when the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 1?
7. How many commandments was Moses given? (Approximate)
8. What are people in America`s far north called? (a) Westerners (b) Southerners (C) NORTHERNERS
9. Spell -- CAT, DOG, PIG
10. Six kings of England have been called George, the last one being George the Sixth. Name the previous five. EXTRA CREDIT: Using your fingers, count from 1-5.
The teacher, alarmed, approached him and asked what is going on?
`I am only following the instructions -- the test paper states, answer the questions in BRIEF!
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